August 3, 2009
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Today is a special day....Not mine, but for someone I care about very much. Today is Berry's birthday. It's also the first time I get to tell her "Happy Birthday" in ten years! It is very exciting.
Funny the way the world works.....Berry is my best friend from high school. I have known her since I was 15...so for 22 years...Besides my family, she is the only person I am friends with who has known me for so long.
Except there was a hitch. Until this spring, we had not spoken in ten years. I am not going to go into details about the why of all this except to say we both were making the best choice for us at the time (for very different reasons)....Or so it seemed....
I can not really properly express the hurt and sorrow of losing my best friend for so long. It took me years to get over it...Not that it is something you really get over, but eventually, the daily sting of it lessens. I was okay as long as I didn't see something that reminded me of Berry or looked through my photo albums of our children playing together. <sigh> It was hard.
And then through an unexpected turn of events (Facebook), Berry contacted me. I was unprepared for her to show back up....And very, very concerned about getting hurt all over again.....But I had changed, I am not the same person I was ten years ago.....And Berry had changed......And I was getting a second chance, which is something I never thought I would have.
So, since early February, Berry and I have been slowly rebuilding our relationship. We started with email and built up to daily IMing. We have laughed, we have cried, we have peeled back our bandaids and looked at the wound underneath, we have contemplated our regrets and our future....It has been hard but wonderful work!
We finally got together in person a few weeks ago when we met and spent a night at nearby campground. We stayed up late talking and woke up early and spent the whole day talking. It was great.
This is one of the harder things I have done in my life....To re-open myself to this friendship. I am thrilled beyond measure and very worried. I worry that the same turn of events will occur to lead to another separation.....But you know what? Berry is such a wonderful person and adds so much to my life...I think that re-friending her is worth the risk....Plus, I might not give up so easily if I was to lose her again.
So, today is her birthday...The first time in ten years that I will not feel sorrow and loss, but joy and contentment. I will not get to see her today, but I have sent her email and IM birthday wishes. (And I will get to see her later this week for a special birthday dinner).
I never expected we would get a second chance and I intend to make the most of it!
Comments (1)
Wow, what an amazing story! I hope it works out! There is a real power in a friend who knew you from long ago, and is still your friend. It's hard to even describe, but I can imagine how important this is.
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